If I could tell you how many people have recently said to me “Oh my god you’re so adult” i’d be pretty rich, well not that rich, i’d probably have a £20 note, but still, that’s enough to go an buy a new And Other Stories top and hopefully you get my point.
A lot of people have been telling me how ‘adult’ I am now, is it because I have a boyfriend? Is it because we live together? Is it because we bought a house together? Or is it because we have a puppy to look after? God knows.
I think there’s a huge problem in the world of ours, well there’s a ridiculous amount of problems but let’s stick to this one specific problem today. When you’re younger you feel the need to grow up quickly, you want to wear makeup, you want to have boobs, you want boys and girls to fancy you, you want a relationship. When you reach 17, you just want to turn 18 so you can buy alcohol, go clubbing. Most go to university, stress because they don’t feel ready to choose a path and degree that could dictate the rest of their life, and if you don’t go to university.. well hello adulthood early.
Either way, ironically in comparison to wanting to be older when you’re a child, you eventually get to a stage of life where you’re scared of being an ‘adult’. You think about what you want when you’re 30 and stress about how you’re going to get there. How do you afford to live on your own? Is it normal to have not been in a relationship by now? I haven’t even found a job I like yet, so how am I meant to settle down or start saving for a property? How do you even save for a property? We spend our childhood stressing about looking and feeling too young and then once we’re older we spend years stressing about turning into an adult and not feeling ready.
Well let me tell you, I am a 23 year old that has done most of the stereotypical things that we class as ‘adult’. I’m in a loving relationship with my boyfriend Ryan, we’ve bought a house together and have a puppy together. Ok, I haven’t had kids or got married yet, but I’ve done a few on the tick list. And to everyone thinking I’m very ‘adult’ – I probably am, but not because I’ve done all these grown-up things, but I truly believe it’s because I’m happy and comfortable where I am at in my career, relationship, and life. To me, being an adult is when you get to the point in life where you’re happy where you are, you look forward to the future but you are also just happy with the pace of life.
Obviously, this is just my thoughts written down, I’m not saying that all stress about the same things as me, or that everyone should have the same criteria to becoming ‘an adult’, it’s just what I’ve discussed with friends and fellow humans online. Would love to know your thoughts on this.
Photos by Henry Mandeville